Automatic my a$$

You know sometimes technology stinks. We think it's making our lives better but sometimes I seriously question if we're going backwards instead of forward.

I went to the doctors the other day. First of all I was not in a particularly happy mood to go as I'd waited a little under two hours the last time I went to this doctor. So I'd already entered the doors of this fine establishment with a chip on my shoulder and battle armor on in case I had to fight.

I approached the receptionist and signed in and as politely as possible told her that I would be able to wait the customary two hours as before and that I would only be able to wait an hour. I then asked her how many people were ahead of me and she informed me that there were three people ahead of me and by the grimace on her face I could clearly see that even she knew that would take more than an hour. But we both agreed that if I was still sitting there within the hour that I would quietly get up, reschedule and leave.

Sidenote: Now that I think about it why I should I have to negotiate waiting an hour for a doctor when I have an explicit appoint time that I adhered to?

Any hoo, I had Baby C with me at this appointment and she was the only one not bothered by all this pent up frustration. As long as she her memory play game to play on my ipod she was happier than a pig in sh*t!

A few minutes into the wait Baby C needed to use the bathroom. I sighed and thought...here go the escapades of three year old bathroom visit....we all know there's nothing routine about this!!!!

And here comes the entire reason I even started this post!!!

So we enter the bathroom and I began to get her ready for that sumo wrestler position that a mother has to do in order to hover their child over the germ ladened toilet seat. As I'm about to hoist her into mid air and assume the position I realize that I need to get rid of the 10 pound pocket book that's slung over my shoulder. There's no way I'm hovering 30 pounds in mid air and ALSO let 10 pounds of unnecessary weight rip my shoulder out of place.

I look around the bathroom for a hook to hang said purse and thats when it comes to me! OH YEAH...this is that stupid bathroom that has no DAMN hook! WTF....

By this point the three year old and the thirty year old are getting a little panic stricken at the thought of wading in impending pee!!! I have to think fast and move quickly........I can't hold that damn purse as it will swing around and hit both of us in the face, I can't put it on the floor as I've never heard of a public restroom that hasn't had a backed toilet that didn't end up all over the floor and the thought of pee and sewage all over the floor is just life threatening......

So I sling the damn purse in sink, hoist the child up and let her go,.......at that point everything started to move in slow motion........as she's hovering and I'm holding................ there goes the AUTOMATIC sink faucet!!!!! Yep.... as I slung my purse in that sink the STUPID sink thought I was ready to wash my hands and provided me with fresh clean water with which to do so, spraying my 10 pound purse inside and out with water!!!!

What was I to do? Try and save my purse from sheer immersion and drop my child in mid pee!!! WTF
Of course right at the opportune moment the 30 pound 3 year old pipes up "Mommy water's going in your bag!"
"No sh*t Sherlock!...are you done peeing yet?"

I finally get to put her down and there goes the AUTOMATIC flushing toilet in unison with the AUTOMATIC faucet!!!! After hand washing adventure of a three year old, I swear I wanted to take a sledge hammer to the AUTOMATIC paper towel dispenser!!!!.

I honestly should have just let her pee on the floor and then told the doctors office that's what they get for not having an damn AUTOMATIC hook!