Giving back to me

As I sit addicted to youtube watching other peoples lives go by I realize I want to capture more, more of the every day the mundane, the nuances that make up my life.

I'm not sure why, in my mind I picture my family reading it when I'm gone, figuring out who their grandmother and great grandmother was back in the day.

All I have are photo's of my grandmother and great grandmother, I don't know who they are, I only have stories and pictures and if I don't write down the stories I hear they all start to fade.

So here I am just trying to document snippets of my life. This morning I took this picture of Baby C ready for school, eating Honey Nut Cherrios watching the cartoon network channel.

It doesn't say much but the picture speaks volumes to me, as I know the night before she went to bed crying, because we were upset or mad at her. Upset because she's a child and wants to take her sweet ass time doing what she wants to do and not leaving enough time to take care of her chores which we end up doing.

This picture here represents her happy the next morning. Happy because she got up when her "first" alarm went off. She did a few of her chores, and made sure her backback, hat and coat were by the door ready BEFORE she sat down to watch tv. She then proudly asked me "Mommy are you still mad at me?" I replied "Of course I'm not mad, you redeemed yourself and took care of what you needed to take care"

This picture here represents a child who often reminds me that my opinion of her does matter to her. My feelings do matter to her, and that makes me happy.

I'm figuring everyone made a turkey pot pie with their left over turkey right? And they made home made ham pizzas with their left over ham right? I'm laughing at this in my head. I'm a little tired of turkey and ham at this point and yet Christmas is right around the corner. I'm thinking cornish hens or something different is in order, but I guess we'll see.

I helped a friend out for her daughters 13th birthday party...leopard and teal were the colors. She wanted to me to shop, set it all up and charge her. I love doing this kind of thing but I do not like the money aspect of it. I mean how do you charge someone for something like this, and especially a friend. It makes me feel uncomfortable, makes me not want to do it any more. But the place turned out very nice so I was happy.

I finally started scrapbooking again and managed to finish two pages. I'm trying to give more time back to myself and trying to say "Yes" less to volunteering for things that pull me away from my family and my home. I'd like to find volunteer work that I could do "with" my family. My tolerance for people and things is becoming less, I feel myself just wanting to pull back a little more from everything.